You have set goals, you have a clear vision for what you want, but when it comes to execution you struggle. Instead of your behaviors and actions supporting your goals, they're interfering with you accomplishing them. You notice yourself procrastinating, making excuses, and getting distracted from your vision. You're succumbing to self sabotage.
Why we do it:
- lack of self-esteem, self-worth, self-confidence, and self-belief
- difficulty managing our daily emotions
- reacting to situations and people in ways that hinder our progress and prevent us from reaching our goals and objectives
- coping with stressful situations or high expectations
Some common ways self sabotage is manifested:
- holding ourselves back from taking risks
- not taking action because we fear to make mistakes aka perfectionism
- people pleasing
- worrying incessantly without looking at situations objectively-analysis paralysis
- setting unrealistic expectations for ourselves and others
- allowing our inner critic to take charge and negatively judging ourselves
- comparison thinking and measuring our value based on what others are doing
Do any of these sound familiar? So how do we stop self sabotaging?
1. Self awareness is the first step. Identify which behavior you’re exhibiting (try using the list above). When does this behavior happen the most? What triggers you? What excuses are you making that are holding you back?
2. Identify a behavior that's healthy that can replace the old one. What would be more appropriate? What are reasons for making this change and why is this a better behavior?
3. Practice the new behavior until it's become habit. Visualization and positive energy around this new habit can help it become ingrained.